I will be puking hearts and lace by the time this weekend is over.

This weekend, one of my best friends is getting married to a right decent guy. This is for them until I can pay that diamond encrusted gravy boat they registered for. Congratulations, Elisa and Ryan - and I'll never forgive you for making me wear a dress. --Neva

“Love songs for loving lovers loving - Radio Romance – K106!”


You’re listening to Radio Romance with me, Roxanne. It’s seventy-two degrees, ten past the hour here on the Love Station…of…Love. I’d like to start this hour with a listener request. Elisa, I hope that you and Ryan are listening because this is to you from his heart.

Ryan writes…“Roxanne – a few years ago, I met the love of my life and her name was Elisa. Our motto is, “Love is only as strong as those who believe in it.” I met Elisa while I was dating her sister so we started out as just friends. When I told Elisa that the relationship had ended, she was hesitant at first, but soon we fell into each others arms. When Elisa’s sister told her that the relationship hadn’t ended…our love wasn’t so strong. But it wasn’t long before we were both believing again.

The course of love didn’t run smoothly – there was a time that Elisa didn’t trust in our love, didn’t trust in me and thought that I might be cheating on her. I told her that she was the only one in my heart, but after the tears, the pain and a trip to Planned Parenthood later, she left me for her anti-biotics medication.

But…the love we shared was stronger than the Chlamydia that she and I, her sister, her mother and – as I found out later – her Nana shared. She eventually forgave them and – to my relief – me.

We each decided to restart our relationship and each started a business. Elisa made jewelry to sell by the beach and I began to sell heroin. I never told Elisa – and soon, I became too ashamed to even live with her anymore. One of my greatest regrets was leaving Elisa that night, not telling her where I was going.

Another one of my greatest regrets was that the night I left was the night my customers figured out that the heroin was just refined packets of Sweet & Low and had come to our building in a mob to claim me. I wasn’t there for Elisa as they tortured her for information about where I was.

The third regret was that after the mob had their way with her and left her barely alive, I did not come back to her right away. As Elisa slowly got better in a rehab facility, I decided to wait until she was more healed before coming back to her. I spent that time living off of my fake heroin earnings in Indonesia. I numbed the pain of not being able to be man enough to be with her with alcohol, para-sailing, her Nana, and our miracle love child we named – of course – Elisa.

We finally did reunite, thanks to fate. We were both in Turkey for different reasons – Nana and Little Elisa and I were traveling through to reach the isles of Greece. Elisa had been sold into white slavery by an orderly at the hospital where she was being cared for. It only took a day and a half before Nana and I agreed to buy her freedom. I do hope that one day, she and her Nana will be reunited, but given how old she is now and how rough the Turks are, it is unlikely. I still hold out hope for a reunion with Little Elisa, though.

Today – Elisa is mostly healed from the physical and mental scars of the past and our time away. Though my love can no longer be on her feet for more than three minutes or effectively grasp items in her left hand, and is prone to having a seizure while opening the refrigerator - she is just as beautiful to me as the day we met – on the field of her junior varsity field hockey practice.

With my song request, I would also like to ask Elisa…would you do me the honor of giving me your hand in marriage?

With a love as strong as I believe,

Ryan”

Well, Elisa – I hope you and Ryan have the happy ending you two deserve. It's fifteen past the hour and seventy-two degrees and here is Ryan's request here on...Radio...Romance.